What is Grief Allyship?

The title of my forthcoming book is duh..dun..dah….

Grief Ally: How to help people you love cope with death, loss, and grief.

Before Grief Ally hits the shelves in January, I wanted to go over some definitions, well … one definition. 

What is Grief Allyship?

Grief Allyship is the act of supporting and advocating for those who are grieving by providing unconditional love, empowerment, and deep reverence for their unique experience with grief.

Grief allyship is the kind of social support that everyone needs after a significant loss. 

Over and over, studies have shown that the quality of someone’s social support network is a powerful indicator of how well they’ll be able to cope, grow, and recover from traumatic life experiences. Grief allyship is the highest standard of that social support that gives a bereaved person what they need to survive, cope, and adapt after a loss that has or will disrupt their life. 

The bereaved need more than messages that say “I’m here if you need me, just call.” But unfortunately that message is really really really common after someone dies. 

Instead, the bereaved need social support that is empowering, respectful, and that actively and unconditionally loves them through all the ways they will shift and change and transform into a life where their beloved is not physically present. 

Sure, a couple lasagnas and text messages are nice but a lasagna is not grief allyship. 

The bereaved need people to ask questions and to listen when they answer honestly. 

They need people to talk about their beloved and to not always be the ones who bring them up in conversation. 

The bereaved need to be empowered to ask for what they need to survive in their grief.

They need respect for however they choose to cope. 

The bereaved need to be loved unconditionally. 

They need team players to support them.

They need people who will ask questions and then respect their answers.

The bereaved need people who will use their strengths and assets to make their lives easier and more comfortable. 


A lasagna might get you through the front door but what will you do when you get inside? Because what you do and say inside matters

In Grief Ally I teach you how to get inside and what to do once you are in there. <3

Grief Ally will be available everywhere that you buy books on January 25, 2022.



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